Interracial Dating Rant: “I Only Date Koreans/I Only Date White Girls!”

On the subject of AMXF relationships (Asian Males/Non-Asian Females), I have little to complain about. Of course, things could be SO much better, but we’re making good progress. However, I am not the type to simply accept average. I want things to be perfect for us! It must be better! And in order to do so, I need to call out the bullshit of some of you women out there, and yes, even some of my Asian brothers.

So here are my current thoughts on our current situation.

Speaking of Situations: Check out this side by side shot of Mike "The situation" vs the Asian version, Peter Le (or as some are calling him "the SituASIAN")

 

Non-Asian Girls Who Only Date Korean/Japanese Men

Things are lookin pretty darn good for Koreans. Aside from the fact that North Korea is being a total d-bag at the moment, in terms of global appeal, Koreans are doing very well for themselves. Not only that, but women all over the world want to snag a Korean boyfriend! Jeebus Christ, even THIS girl wants a Korean man!

And hey, I’m all for it. I will ride this Korean wave and I will continue to support my brothers because to me, they aren’t just Koreans, they’re Asian. But despite their mass appeal growing faster than Adam Richmond’s belly, I have to point out that their influence is a double edged sword.

One one hand, Korean men are doing wonderful things for Korean men. But on the flip side, a ton of women are now saying “OMG I LOVE Korean guys! ZOMFG SOOO HAWT! Taeyang can have like, 80 of my babies! I want  to find myself a Korean boyfriend, and ONLY Korean!” So while these girls are open to dating Asian guys, some of them have their preferences set on “Korean only” or “Japanese only.”

Now hey, for some of you light skinned Asian dudes who can pull off the Korean look, more power to you. But what about us Asian guys that look nothing like a Korean? I’m proud that you sexy black chicks and sassy Latinas are into Korean guys, but you’re missing the point! The purpose of being open minded is to be OPEN, not racially picky.

"Hmmm....do I want Korean men today, or Korean men?"

Okay, I know what some of you might be thinking: “Well hey! That’s just who I’m attracted to. Why are you judging me? I should be able to like who I want!” True. You’re absolutely correct. But do you know what it feels like to be in our situation? No? Let me show you.

 

 

Asian Guys Who Only Date White Girls

Thank you Saci for sending me this awesome picture :)

The moment an Asian guy says “I want to date outside of my race” is a magical and WONDERFUL event that should be celebrated with lots of champagne, crazy Asian techno music, and lots and lots of Karaoke. 90% of the time, an Asian guy that is interested in Interracial Dating will almost always go for White girls. I mean shit, I did the same exact thing! So what exactly am I complaining about?

What I’m criticizing are the instances when Asian guys date ONLY White girls. Asian guys who are so passionate about “Give Asian guys a chance!” yet in the same breath, they state that they only date White chicks. My Asian brother, what’s up with that?! You make absolutely no sense!

It pains me to see so many gorgeous, intelligent, and passionate Black women who are so interested in dating Asian men; Black women are willing to post tons of videos on Youtube to show their support for us, and absolutely zero Asian guys willing to return the favor. Yes, there are a fair number of Asian guys who do, but compared to Asian guys who go apeshit over White girls? It’s appalling.

My Asian brother, listen to me: outside of Marshmallow land, there is a land of CHOCOLATE! A land where the rivers are flowing with dark, light, and even spicy (for all you Caribbean ladies) flavored chocolate. There are black girls who are thick, skinny, tall, short, and everything in between.

I'll take one of each :D

Next door, there is also a land of Spicy food! A land where the Latinas roam free, spreading their sexyness around the world. And guess what?! They want you! And guess what?! YOU WANT THEM!

There is so much more to Interracial Dating than White girls. I’m not trying to diss White women because honestly, I love you all (my first “love” was a blondie). But just know that there is a whole world of Women out there and so many of them are willing to accept you. So many of them are open minded and have taken the time to understand our complex Asian culture, and have stated that they’re interested. So please, return the favor. Give them a try, take them out, marry them, and have 80 of their babies.

Asian Babies: Ladies, you KNOW you want one ;)

What Does This All Mean?

There’s more to life than Kimchi, Sushi, and Marshmallows. And also, don’t underestimate the power of a Filipino guy because truthfully… we’re Berry Priendly ;)

64 thoughts on “Interracial Dating Rant: “I Only Date Koreans/I Only Date White Girls!”

  1. I gotta be honest. I was very disappointed with a korean guy. We went on a lot of dates. We were partically dating according to him, but in the end he ended picking a korean girl because to him he felt more comfortable speaking to her in korean and there were things he said I wouldn’t understand about his culture. I even research everything about the korean culture because it never occurred to me to date an asian. After we ended I made up my mind to never ever date another asian guy because it is hard. There is only a small percentage who are willing to date out of their race and there aren’t many asians here in Miami either. It is true and sad that there are a lot of Latinas and black women who put themselves out there and asian guys don’t even give them a glance. Also I understand that some asian guys think we are not interested in them because of the whole asian stereotypes, but still I know a lot of Latinas who want to date asian guys and nothing happens. I was one of those latinas. I really enjoyed reading your post sorry for the long paragraph but I’m just letting you know the downside of sometimes dating an asian guy. I know it is not like that for some like my sister who ended up marrying a filipino and my nephew is adorable/handsome ^_^

    • Francis,

      I’m sorry for your unfortunate experiences with dating asian guys. however, I do have a few things to mention in defense of Asian men.

      1. Even though it’s common for men to do the approaching, women can also do the same. I think it’s unfair to say that “nothing happens” because in the end, both the girl and the guy have equal opportunities to approach the other. Just because a guy doesn’t go up to you doesn’t mean it’s automatically his loss/fault.

      2. I think it’s dumb when people date inside their race for the purpose of “being able to talk to someone in their native language.” I mean sure, it’s good to exercise your own culture on a day to day basis, but really? Is that honestly a reason to NOT be with someone?

      What next? Are people only going to date inside their race because they only like eating their cultures food? That’s the reason why interracial dating is what it is! It’s a mix of cultures! There will be a clash and there will be struggles but that’s what also makes it great!

    • Hey Francis,
      I’m sorry to hear this and I can’t relate to you more. I dated 3 south koreans in the past who were either cold, players or just dissapeared from my life one day.
      I was very dissapointed on them as on guys in general. but my advice is don’t close yourself to the world. Bad guys are everywhere but you have to wait for a good one to come your way.
      P.d. this latina is getting married to the loveliest thai guy ever in 2 months. :’)

  2. I personally made the decision to date Asian men exclusively because Asian studies and Asian-American issues have been a huge part of my life for over ten years; it has actually come to define my life, and that’s never going to go away. My preference for Asian men is strong enough that I don’t feel like it makes sense to date a non-Asian man. I certainly don’t go out of my way to — and while I could theoretically make an exception for some amazing non-Asian guy, I’m concerned that problems would arise because he’d feel insecure over my passion for Asian culture, Asian men, and Asian-American issues. He’d wonder if I settled — and frankly, so would I. I know that sounds harsh, but in something that’s (supposed to be) permanent like marriage, why settle?

    I realized very early on in life that I was attracted to Asian men above all others, and was showing leanings in that direction well before I realized it (crushing on Eurasian actors Dean Cain and Keanu Reeves as a young girl, completely unaware of their Asian heritage). That’s an esthetic preference. I was never attracted to black boys, almost never attracted to white boys, and occasionally attracted to Latino and Native American boys. Over time, they just disappeared from the equation for me, not because I can’t appreciate their culture or objectively acknowledge them as attractive, but they just don’t do anything for me, you know? Attraction is based on more than just the esthetic — I firmly believe that culture comes into play, and there just aren’t any suitable non-Asians in my “scene”.

    Maybe I’m a racist bitch, but the way I see it, my ladyparts aren’t the public domain and political correctness has no place in my bedroom: I’m entitled to my preference, even if it isn’t “equal opportunity”.

    • Perhaps I’m being a biased bitch but honestly, I commend you for your preference :D

      As PC as I’d like everyone to be, in the end, you like what you like. But as long as you aren’t being ignorant about it and viewing one race as ULTIMATE and the others inferior.

      With that said, date away, my love! :) I just wish more women could be as open as you. Perhaps you could lead the Asian male loving army? yea? :D

  3. Yeahs, the ‘I only date korean guys’ thing … Would have pleaded guilty to that a few months ago but not anymore! I’ve been set free! But still i know what u mean, what i wouldnt give to have Taeyang’s 80 babies!!! Yes korean dudes doing very well for themselves but so are the chinese, taiwanese… Name them! Asian brothers where for art thou ; )

  4. wow interesting post. Honestly I am totally guilty of what you were talking about, but I guess it helped me reflect on that. Still, what I wouldn’t give to have Rain’s 80 babies lol xD

  5. I plead guilty (^-^). I mean I love my man Asian and as wrote L my passion for Asian culture is too strong and it is a part of my own culture now. I date other people but I can’t picture myself without a Asian husband nor a Asian baby. God thanks my baby is…guess what, KOREAN!

  6. I would date a Korean guys. I wonder if they would date with Mongolian girls. Then it is going to be asian/asian…doesn’t make sense here in this forum hmmmmmmm ;(

  7. Awesome article!

    I just meat a Korean guy(born and raised in Korea) and in talking and getting to know one another he immediately started addressing how insecure he felt about Asian male stereotypes and asking me if I was sure I wouldn’t be disappointed with him. I didn’t realize until that point that these emasculating themes about Asian men had such an impact on relating to them as a non Asian woman. I had to reassure him over and over again that the rumors about black men and white men’s prowess were not true and that men are just men. He was really worried. He has since calmed down and has taken to grinning at me whilst rubbing his hands together. lol

  8. I’m ONLY attracted to asian guys (koreans in particular), tho I’m half (Japanese-Korean, Metis-Norawegian (I look white all hell!) but, i loved this!*goes off to find a korean boyfriend* rofl

  9. Hey, I just came across your blog and wanted to say that I’m really enjoying it so far. I’m a (white) Canadian girl living in Seoul. I’m VERY attracted to Korean guys (I have dated and am open to dating guys from all backgrounds, but hey, when you’re surrounded by Korean guys at the moment…) but it’s not that easy to find a Korean guy who wants a RELATIONSHIP with a white girl in Korea. Many of them just want to hook up because (A) white girls are seen as ‘easier’ than Korean girls and (B) the pressure from family/society to marry a Korean girl. [sigh]

    Anyway, in the meantime, the search is fun ;)

    Love the 태양 reference, btw. Will keep following your blog.

    Amanda

    • I know what you mean about having a hard time finding a Korean man who wants a relationship with a white female. It seems like a lot of the time they are interested in just a hook-up with a white girl, while they’d only marry a Korean to please their families. But surely not all Korean men are like that! I’m thinking of going back to teach in Korea next year (was already there for a year and a half) so maybe this time around I’ll have better luck LOL

  10. OMFG this bugs the hell outta me!!!! I feel like we, black women, are ALWAYS at the bottom! In the off chance that an asian guy gets any girl that isn’t asian, its ALWAYS a damn white girl! WTF

  11. Please. Korean guys don’t hold a candle to those fine Filipinos and Viets. It seems like every time I do a double take over an Asian guy, he’s Filipino or half-Filipino.

    Excellent blog post. I’m pretty sure I’ll never be able to land any Asian, but it is always great to see one who is aware and speaking the truth anyways.

  12. I wonder why so many girls are attracted to ONLY Korean
    men?! I guess it’s sort of a “fantasy into reality” thing for
    them. Most of the Korean men I come across look NOTHING
    like the Korean celebrities we tend to drool over. Not that
    they aren’t attractive–I’m just saying that girls shouldn’t
    compare them to K-pop celebrities.

  13. I think many women are attracted to Korean men because we have an aura of masculinity yet sensitivity. Koreans guys tend to be taller and have a better build than other Asian guys.
    Let’s get real physical attraction plays an important initial role.
    Korean guys cherish their family work hard to provide for them.
    I think for most western women Korean American guys would be a better choice because they would have a better understanding of both cultures.

    @Francis,
    I hope you’re not generalizing all Korean guys due to one bad apple. If I did that I would never date another latina again. I didn’t even know there were any Koreans in Miami area. I didn’t even see one when I was in south beach. LOL !

  14. So I’m a black woman that doesn’t have a preference and people still hate it. I have noticed that my significant others change with my location though. I from MO and mostly dated white guys. Then when I moved to Miami I found that i was only being approached and dated hispanic (puerto rican) guys now I’m in AZ and mtost of the guys that are attractive to me are asian guys (and still some puerto rican 2). I dont date only one race and this pisses ppl off but I find men of all races FIONEEEE. I dont think I could ever choose just one plus i move too much to just stick to any particular race.

  15. WOW!!! Another great article! I can’t and won’t get mad at the Asian men who only prefer white girls, because I have my racial preferences also. I strongly prefer White, Asian, and Latin men. The skin contrast to me, is VERY arousing. However, I will never go out of my way to disrespect a black man. I want for him to be happy also. To be honest, love to me is not colorless. I do see the color and depending on what it is, I become attracted. The same case applies to the Asian men and Non-Asian women you wrote about.

    On the flip side, I can clearly see how some Asian men and Non-black females can feel that slight “ouch” when they hear that they are among those who aren’t preferred. All I can say is to brush it off, and keep it moving. There are PLENTY of other men and women out there :)

  16. As a black woman I’ll admit my first HUGE Asian crush was a Korean celeb (Kim JaeJoong from TVXQ) six years ago when I was twelve, but I didn’t see him as Korean, I saw him as Asian, I just noticed I tend to be most attracted to Koreans (and vice-versa ;D), but I love all Asian men :)

    The ones that want to date interracially *are* most of the time, only limiting themselves to white chicks, which bothers me more than it should. I don’t have anything against white girls, I just hate the thought of being romantically one-upped by one. It serves as a painful reminder that not everyone is past the BS “ultimate girl” image of them the media pushes.

  17. Here is what I find funny. The black women make countless videos and blogs on how they love Asian men, Asian men mostly go ga-ga for white girls (while ignoring the black girls), and then….SIGHS….the white girls for the most part aren’t even in to Asian men.

    This is a good blog, but I think black women should try other options and focus less on Asian men.

  18. @ mikayla

    Your post is interesting, but I hope you are not trying to discourage Asian men from finding love and having their preferences. I don’t make videos about my desire for Asian men, but fortunately, I have encountered a handful of Asian males who are not only good-looking, but who would date black women. I actually had to join a few sites for AMBW relations and travel to other states to meet these men.

    Besides, I only focus on videos and blogs that discuss AMBW, WMBW, and LMBW relationships. I have nothing against other interracial unions, but I highly doubt that a white woman or a Latina can relate to me when it comes to these topics.

  19. Pingback: ALL GIRLS INTO ASIANS READ!!!! « blackandyellowambw

  20. ahaha imma korean asian bro and i agree man! im a 1.5 generation twinkie and even though i may have my preferences, im still open to all races/cultures ;P

  21. and those girls [guys as well] that date/like people only because he or she is of a specific race/culture is usually crazy or obssessed in some messed up ways…i call it the “Yellow fetish/fever or yellow obssession syndrome.”

    just because one likes certain things from another race/culture, they shouldnt let that interfere/dictate who they like to date and such. example: if you like kpop and just because the ppl in the pop culture/media are portrayed as unbelievably attractive, one should not let that be a factor in who one choices to be interested in.

  22. This post is so true. I do have some friends who fall into the category of being in love with korean guys or guys of certain ethnicities. But I’ve seen men of every color/race/etc. that are absolutely handsome. You can’t limit yourself, life is too short. And that’s in real life. Forget celebs, models, and k-pop stars. People need to just look around them; in the grocery store, on the train, on your college campus, not so much the Korean BBQ place. I just found your blog, and I love your style and bluntness! Keep it up.

  23. Your post really made me laugh and I agree with you that both men and women should really be open minded especially if they want to date outside of their race. I’m actually mixed and I’m part Puertorican and part White and I love being mixed and sure there are some cultural clashes but I think that’s what makes it more exciting. I have only dated Puertorican men but I’m definitely interested in dating an Asian man…I just haven’t found one yet =\

  24. way to beat a dead horse.
    anywho I’m filipino-american and as much as I’d like to agree with the poster. I haven’t had any lucky as of recent. I got dumped/rejected multiple times for NOT being korean. So no I don’t think it’s true what girls say and mind these women I dated were different races black, white, latina..etc. I haven’t had any lucky they wanted the ‘real’ thing. Preference nowadays is extremely biased it’s just korean they look better, they have good food, culture. etc..what’s not to miss? I wish more asian cultures would spring up about but that’s not going to happen anytime soon. :/ also all the women i knew were shallow aside from how well I treated them. Years ago I would be happy to hear this but as lately nahh..I can’t deny reality.

  25. i think its unfair how most asian guys will date and only date white women, like look at Heecul he said he might have an interracial marriage, but he said to white women only which crushed my heart, but me and my friends are thinking of contacting him and asking if black women and latinas another option.

    Also Falco why do asian celebrities from asia always try white girls, but never a black girl or latina, I mean i know asians aren’t exposed enough, but don’t limit yourself to white women and asian, which really gets on my nerves because what about black n latina chicks

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  27. Sooo true …

    Asian guys always either date Asian or white girls :s sometimes I wish I was white so I’d be on top but as a Latina Asian guys still come after me lol so I’m happy to be a spicy latina

  28. @whatamidoinghere
    There are many Korean guys who dig latinas, like me.
    Although most of my girlfriends have been white girls I’ve dated many latinas too. I’ve seen quite a few in California. Also tons of Koreans guys with latinas in Brazil during my travels.

  29. I’d like to share my experience with http://www.globorgirls.com. It’s actually more of a social network thing for people who would like to meet travel mates from different countries. The good thing about it is that it’s totally secure because they have the feature of video chatting with these girls so you’ll not share your personal contacts unless you’re 100% sure. You’ll also find pretty good tips on how to stay safe online and also some traveling tips. All in all, it was a very good experience.

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  31. This is a very interesting development in inter-racial relationships that I’ve just discovered. I’m probably a lot older than most people commenting here. I’m a white female and have been with my husband for 18 years. He was born and raised in Korea and moved here when he was 18. I met him in So Cal where I grew up. It was just a couple weeks before he was to leave for graduate school. We developed an intense connection in those 2 weeks and I was lucky to be able to transfer with my job to the same state (but a couple hours from where he was going to school). But it was not a good state for an AMWF couple. It was hard. Luckily he got a job in the Bay Area when he graduated, and we moved to a place where a couple like us was not a big deal (though still somewhat of a novelty at that time).

    Though he is his own unique person, it’s interesting to see that some of the qualities I fell in love with are written about as being qualities shared by many Korean men. mik wrote about an “aura of masculinity yet sensitivity”, which is one of the things that made me incredibly attracted to my husband. I knew nothing about Korea when I met him, but have learned about the culture over the years. It’s amazing to me, and very cool, how things are changing. So glad to have others appreciating what I appreciate. On a silly note, never in a million years would I have imagined that Trader Joe’s would one day sell products like bibimbap and kimchi.

  32. I am an black girl but im diffrent then most in my area. I do find what you mean i dont judge on race i think all asians are attractive the thing that bothers me no one looks for the black people there is alot of asians at my school and i admit i liked him alot but he never really talked to the black girls. I finally got guts to ask him out. He seemed interested but i geuss not i know you explained this before but you got anymore tips.

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