“You’re so hot. You are SOOO fucking HAWT! UGH! I WOULD HAVE SEX WITH YOU! You wanna do it? Right now? Here? In the bathroom? LETS GO!”
After a few words of encouragement, I washed my hands and walked out of the men’s bathroom, patting my damp fingers along the side of my leg. Now here’s the thing: when it comes to wining and dining women, I’m a pro. I know the moves, I have the lines, and my confidence is so high I make Fabio look like McLovin. But no matter how many dates I’ve been in the past, I have to admit… I’ve never been on a blind date. And you know what? I’m nervous as shit.
The original plan was to meet Cyan (my date) at my favorite Korean BBQ restaurant by 7:30 pm. Unfortunately, she told me – via text message *facepalm*- that she doesn’t like BBQ joints because of the tendency to walk out smelling like meat smoke. Fine, no biggie. So that’s how I found myself sitting in a table at Sushi-Ya by myself, for over 30 minutes.
The decor in Sushi-Ya feels like you’re living in a giant bento box. Everything is made out of wood, painted black, trimmed in red. As always, Japanese “art” was suspended from the walls, along with a few samurai swords and samurai masks. Due to the change of plans, I had to push back our date from 7:30pm to 8:30. It is now 9:04pm. My shirt collar feels like it’s getting tighter, and I can feel a pad of moisture forming at my back. A bell rang.
For a split second I KNEW it was Cyan, but at the same time, I had this weird cynical feeling that it wasn’t. That maybe some random yet totally hot black chick walked in by accident. Cyan looked at me, and I at her. I froze, and then I saw her look around, as if she didn’t even notice me. A look for frustration formed at her brows as she pulled out her cell phone, and started to dial. I immediately walked over and introduced myself
Me: Heyyy! Cyan, right?
Me: That’s me!
Cyan: Hi, nice to meet you!
Me: Nice to finally meet you too! I’m just over here if you wanna come sit.
Cyan: Yea, sure sure!
(Just as I was about to sit down, she pulled up her chair and took a seat, which gave me a glimpse of how perfect her rear end was.)
Me: Did you have trouble finding this place? I know it’s kinda hidden and all bu–
Cyan: No it’s cool, I go to the Market nearby so I’m sorta familiar with this area.
Me: Nijiya Market?
Cyan: Yup, that’s the one.
Me: Oh wow, very nice. Do you cook Japanese food often or something?
Cyan: Sorry, ummm, can we order something? I’m just starving.
Me: …uhhhh…yea, sure! Sorry about that. I’m sure you’re hungry.
Cyan: I’ve been waiting to eat for like, forever!
Meh…we were off to an okay start. Not bad, yet not good. She ordered a cup of Sake which I watched her down like orange juice. Despite the Sake breath, she started to loosen up a bit. We talked about school, family, and she finished answering my cooking question. “No, I just go there for the Mochi ice cream.”
Me: So I read that you like Korean music, right?
Cyan: Totally. I’m a big fan of anything Korean. I actually dated a few Korean guys in the past.
Cyan: Yup yup.
Me: Why Korean?
Cyan: After I got into the whole K-Pop scene, my girlfriends and I just started, I don’t know, dating them.
Me: Haha! Just like that?
Cyan: Ummm….no? It’s not like we’re easy or anything–
Me: NO! I didn’t mean it like that.
Cyan: Yea, okay.
Me: What I meant was, you just started listening to K-Pop and bam! You wanted to date Korean guys?
Cyan: Pretty much.
Me: Awww, so no love for the Filipino guys?
Cyan: Not really. They’re kinda short in my opinion.
Me: …okay? I guess.
Cyan: Wait, are you Filipino?
Me: Yes, I’m Filipino.
Cyan: I thought you were Vietnamese?
Me: When did I say that?
Cyan: In your profile. You said you were part Viet in your profile.
Me: Chinese. I’m part Chinese.
Cyan: Well, you look Viet.
Me: …I guess. Whatever.
At that moment I just wanted to jab my chopsticks straight into her pretty little eyes. I felt so bothered that my physical attraction to her started to wear off. Forty five minutes into our date, our vibe was less “Romantic Valentines” and more “hurry the hell up and finish your food so I can pay for dinner and leave!”
Me: Alright, well, it was nice meeting you.
Cyan: You too.
Me: I’ll ummm… shoot you a Facebook message or something.
Cyan: K! Byee!
And just like that, she left. Worst date ever, followed by the most awkward hug ever. To make matters worse, I didn’t even get a chance to really eat! I was so concentrated on leaving that I avoided ordering more food. Tormented by a growling stomach, I crawled into the Nijiya Market to grab a snack to eat.
My body was tired and I slugged around the aisles like a war hero with one too many bullet holes in his chest. Pocky sticks here, Choco Gummies there, and a bag of soda candy. After filling my shopping cart 1/5th of the way with snacks, I decided to load up on drinks. Hmmm…what to get….
“Can I help you find anything?”
Me: Yea ummmm, where is your–
And at that moment…
I looked up, and saw where that heavenly voice was coming from.
Me: Yea, I’m just looking for the Milk Teas.
Cute Black Girl: Oh, they’re riiiiiiiightttttttttttttttt…………here!
Me: Oh! Thank you!
Cute Black Girl: Is that the right one? We also have a few other brands in the backroom if you want.
Me: No no, this is fine. Thank you very much (looks at her name tag) Fuchsia.
Fuchsia: You’re welcome!
I could have left. Maybe I should have, in order to let her get back to her work – but I didn’t. No one was in the store, and I figured I’d keep Fuchsia company for a few more minutes.
Me: …Slow night?
Fuchsia: Yea, everyone is out for Valentines day. I guess it sucks but I enjoy the peace and quiet. My manager lets me look at the magazines just as long as no one is in the store.
Me: Hey! Whatever kills time, right? I’m Ranier by the way
Fuchsia: Rainier… as in Mt. Rainier?
Me: Haha yea, although mine is spelled differently. It’s actually a–
Fuchsia: A Filipino name, right?
Me: WOW… how the HELL did you know?
Fuchsia: I’m trying to learn Tagalog and in my textbook, one of the characters is named “Ranier.”
Me: Damnit! I thought I the only Ranier in the world! haha
Fuchsia: It’s still a beautiful name though🙂
Me: Oh please! Fuchsia? Now THAT is a pretty name!🙂
Fuchsia: Thank you🙂 Well, I better get back to work. Someone just came in.
Me: No no, go for it. I’ll see you around. Maybe I’ll come by again and try out those other Milk Tea brands.
Fuchsia: I work the night shift.
Me: I’ll keep that in mind.
And just like that… Valentines day was romantic again.
….. I wish this story was true -_-