Being in an interracial relationship, in a way, is almost like being a celebrity: all eyes – Black, White, Asian, or Brown – are on you. Curious eyeballs are whispering salty nothings into each other’s ears as they speculate the big question that is on their minds: “why is SHE with HIM?”
If you’re strong, you’ll toss that bullshit out the window faster than a cocaine dealer flushing down hisstash when the cops come knockin’. You block out the gossip and remember that, when the lights are low and it’s time to hit the sack, you aren’t sharing a bed with your girlfriend and the chatty baristas at Starbucks. Only your opinion, and the opinion of your mate is what counts. If you’re not strong enough to do this, if you care too much about what he says or she said when you, a 28 year-old Latin woman walked by with your Malaysian boyfriend, then maybe interracial dating isn’t for you.
Luckily for me, I’ve become a pro at blocking out “observers” from my field of vision. Even for me, when random guys eyeball me and Livi, or they actually say something to us (one guy asked Livi if she was with me for the “Guap” – aka, money) I find myself chuckling all the way home. Although, it must be noted that although guys have said many things, one group of guys says it the most: Black Men.
“Jeebus! Ranier, you must hate Black Men for being such haters, right?!”
In all honesty, despite the many things that random Black guys have said to us – including but not limited to: “Does he pay you a nickel for every time you say ‘I love you’?” and “REALLY?! (in front of our faces)” – I seriously don’t. The fact of the matter is that no matter what ethnicity you’re dealing with, there are always men in that group who feel like they own all of the women from their race. Men who act as if their women are betraying them, even though they themselves are in a relationship.
Men will be men and for as long as a piece of floppy skin dangles between their hairy legs, they will always be overly possessive, and utterly illogical. Furthermore, it’s not like all Black Men have a problem with Black Women dating outside their race. The guys that do tend to think this way are often times, in my experience, ghetto men. Not even ghetto black men, but ghetto guys altogether. I’ve had a couple random Latin guys make annoying comments about us too.
So to answer that question stated above, no, I don’t hate Black Men. Even before I found an interest in AMBW dating, I was always an advocate for the empowerment of Black Men and Women, and minorities in general. If for some reason you do hate the men/women of your girlfriend’s race, then good luck to you when you have to meet their parents…