Why You Suck At Interracial Dating: You Want Him To Look Asian But Act “Caucasian”

As a professional Internetz navigator, I have learned to develop a thick skin for stupid comments. Youtube comments, Facebook comments, and yes, WorldStarHipHop comments. I avoid responding to idiotic comments since I have zero patience to debate the logistics of blackface with a 34-year old manlet from Kentucky. In rare instances, a comment or two will jolt through my system and I’ll feel a sudden urge to speak up.

This was one of those instances.

ITALIAN

I get it, she had a blast with Mr. Italy – that’s cool! Heck, that guy could have treated her out to Sizzler on an early bird special and finished the night eating a cannoli out of her cornhole – WHO KNOWS?! But why the comparison? Why do Asian men need to learn a lesson from Italian Men? And why am I so upset about this minor, no-need-to-worry comment that could have been flicked like the booger it was? Simple: a lot of people who date interracially fail to understand the qualities of an ethnic group because they’re constantly comparing it to others.

This is a driving force as to why people think Asians are shy, Blacks are aggressive, and Latinas are sex-crazy. Instead of appreciating the aspects of one culture as a unique and individual category, they constantly weigh it against a particular standard (which is generally White, Western culture.) They may see a cute Asian guy who failed to maintain eye contact and they’ll propagate, “ugh! He’s so shy! Why can’t he be like White guys and just look at me?!” Instead, she could have asked, “Does he come from a place where eye contact is disrespectful? Is eye contact only reserved for close friends and lovers? WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!”

11

“He grabbed by boob 8 times. But why? Wait… isn’t 8 a lucky number in China? SWEET!”

Too often I see this comparison made. It’s almost as if people wanna date Asians but are secretly looking for all the characteristics of a Southern White guy or a New York Black guy (whatever the hell that means.) This makes just as much sense as visiting the local Sushi bar, ordering a spicy tuna roll only to complain, “ugh! this tastes nothing like a bacon double cheeseburger!”

Furthermore, I think there’s another discreet yet equally damaging effect that develops when you’re always measuring the quality of cultures in reference to another: language. Asians guys are timid compared to Blacks. Black women are ratchet compared to Asians. Asian women are docile compared to Whites. White men are more stable than Latinos. These note cards organized in our compendium of language, though tiny and modest in appearance, begin to construct a dictionary used to define that ethnic group.

1b-003-ss-09-cwebb_lg

Sadly, THIS was how America used to compare and define its members…

It starts to turn into: Asian guys aren’t just more timid compared to blacks, they ARE timid by definition. But are they? As easy as it is to view Asian men as too shy or too weak and that they need to “learn from Italian men,” couldn’t that same Asian man say, “that Black girl was too aggressive and too violent for my taste”? While she’s swooning over Mr. Italy’s generosity and canoli-eating skills, what if he’s looking back at her as easy and gullible compared to Italian girls?

Why It Matters

"Oh hey there! I'm just about to pour you some tea!"

“Oh hey there! You’re just in time for a nice cup of tea!”

In your quest to find love outside the colored box you were drawn into, you will meet someone. You’ll meet a great man or woman and they’ll be the opposite of you with hair that feels lighter, eyes that look darker, or skin that tastes sweeter. They may may be concerned about different political issues or social issues, have contrasting expectations for who does the dishes or an assorted  opinion on how loud is loud when talking on the phone.

These are some of the moments you might expect from an interracial relationship.

Moments when your expectations collide with theirs. If you’ve listened to what I was trying to say, if you know how to accept the beauty and the individuality and the specificity of each culture as they are, without lamenting over how right or wrong it is compared to your own culture or another, if you can do that you’ll not only be equipped with the knowledge of interracial dating 101, but you won’t fret over a collision of cultures because you managed to find harmony between them.

70fffc544fe94af6ebd554a78386dce3

7 Reasons Why Arthur Chu Is Actually A Jeopardy-DOMINATING Money-Making BADASS!

The fact that you are reading this is a disgrace. How do you not know who Arthur Chu is?! Have you been living under a ro…

Oh…

Well, Arthur Chu is basically the Zeus God of Jeopardy and is making a KILLING with his use of game theory. He essentially says “fuck it” to the conventional way of playing Jeopardy and uses his Asian wizard powers to dominate and crush his opponents. Unfortunately, the racists have splashed from within the toilet bowl to spew their moronic, ignorant comments. But you know what? FUCK THAT! Arthur Chu is your dominatrix and your are his ball-gag-wearing bitch. Here are a few reasons why:

1. He’s not phased by Alex Trebek

Arthur Chu was never starstruck by Alex Trebek. In fact, after winning Jeopardy Arthur went to Trebek’s office, sat on his chair, and began eating a roast beef sandwich while Alex wiped the crumbs off his chest. Arthur does whatever he wants.

2. Arthur Chu = the Villain from James Bond: Goldeneye, Odd Job

Arthur Chu inspired the character of Odd Job due to his ruthlessness and intelligence. Correction: Odd Job was the CHILDREN’S version of Arthur Chu because once, Arthur Chu bit off a man’s bicep because he accidentally sneezed in Arthur’s way.

Lesson learned.

3. He’s Pretty Much The Mark Zuckerberg of Jeopardy

After his fourth consecutive win on Jeopardy, Arthur totaled over $100,000. People criticize him for his style but guess what? He’s so CASH MONEY he doesn’t even need to wear clothes. In fact, underneath the podium is a team of fans “servicing” Arthur’s Dong-Zilla. SO TRUE. Just google it. Trust me.

4. He Does Voice Overs – As a SIDE JOB

DUDE! That puts him on the same league as Morgan Freeman. How can you watch that video and NOT be all excited about Sous-Vide? I want one. I want one now. And if you’re a single woman and you watch this, GOD HELP YOU and your erupting panties.

You’ve been warned.

5. PLOT TWIST: He’s A Family Man

You know how in movies when they reveal the Villain’s motives and you suddenly realize, “holy crap, he’s not a bad guy after all!” Well, this is where Arthur’s evil personality takes a turn: he’s happily married and he’s planning for his future family. He doesn’t give a damn what anyone says about him on Twitter or Fox News because he knows he’s winning big money, and he sees how much his family will benefit from it. So who cares what the hell Jimmy McDonald from Florida says about his shirt, or his eyes? In an age of father-less children who have never had a chance to call anyone dad, this is something I have great respect for.

6. He’s An Asian American BAUCE On National Television

It amazes me how few Asian Americans exist on television. From our misrepresentation on shows like “The Bachelor” to our horribly stereotyped characters on “Broke Girls”, I can’t help but feel pessimistic about America’s attempt at highlighting our stories. So to see Arthur Chu rip a gaping hole in the minds of racist Americans through his abrasive playing style makes me giddy like an Anime school girl. To me, I just love the fact that he’s a regular Asian dude doing great things and THAT is an accurate representation of how us Asians truly are doing in America.

7. He’s In An Interracial Marriage!!!!

SURPRISE, MOTHAF*CKA!

How dare you think I wouldn’t make this relevant! HOW DARE YOU! But yes, Arthur Chu is in an Interracial relationship. So that just makes him that much more of an Asian-American, Jeopardy-Crushing, Money-Collecting, Interracial-Dating, Hero.

# IN ARTHUR CHU WE TRUST

Asian Culture Tips For Non-Asian Girls: How To Do The Asian Head Bow

I get a lot of fan mail from my blog readers about how much they love Asian culture. They talk about how much of the Korean language they’re learning in class, and how good they are at chopsticks. Up front I congratulate them but deep down in the center of my cold Asian heart — where my future Tiger Father will soon flourish — I want to *politely and gently* slap them with all my might.

“Go away. I’m allergic to Weeaboos”

You see, Asian culture really isn’t that difficult to understand. Whether you’re a pro at it or you can’t tell the difference between Kimchi and Toyota, I have a handful of easy tips to place into your non-Asian bag of tricks. First things first…

Learn The Asian Head Bow!

Obama rockin’ the Asian head bow like a champ.

You know how in movies whenever an Asian businessman meets an American businessman for the first time there’s always that awkward handshake scene? Yea, don’t even try to bow to your hot Asian date. Why? First off, most younger Asian guys don’t even do that kind of bow and second, it would come off as racist if you do it to him.

How It’s Done:

In most cases, 15 degrees is perfect. Anything more and you better be meeting the president of Taiwan or Kim Jong Un.

1. Position your body like you’re ready to bow down

2. Bend from your neck/upper chest — kinda like you’re nodding your head.

3. Bend down only about 15-20 degrees.

4. You can maintain eye contact while bowing down if you want. If not, no biggie.

 

Why You Should Do It:

“I like my girls curvy, tan skinned, and raised to respect their elders!”

The Asian head bow is something that no one has ever instructed me to do, I just do it because I see other Asians do it. It’s basically a casual way of saying, “I acknowledge you and I respect you” — or whatever kinda of zen bullshit you wanna come up with. It’s essentially the non-verbal equivalent of saying thank you and can be used towards anyone.

When To Do It/To Whom:

If all else fails and you can’t score with your Asian date, bowing to the cute Asian waiter might catch his attention! YOU NEVER KNOW!!

Whenever you’re engaging in some sort of business transaction: paying the cashier at the bookstore, giving your credit card to your waitress, or thanking the Sushi Chef after you leave the restaurant, make it a point to do the head bow. It doesn’t have to be some grandiose spectacle that requires precise timing and background music — you just do it. It’s quick and simple, much like a head-nod or a thumbs up. You especially do this towards older Asian people.

 

How You Can F*ck It Up:

lulz

Timing, intensity, and location are key. You can’t bow too slowly or else you’ll look like you’re seeking attention, nor can you bow too low or you’ll just look like those awkward Americans who doesn’t know jack shit about Asian culture. Additionally, you shouldn’t just do it any damn time you like or you might run the risk of coming off socially awkward.

It should merely be the cherry on top — not the entire goddamn ice cream itself. So relax… it’s not that difficult.

Asian Guy Confessions: I F*CKING LOVE My Black Girlfriend’s Natural Hair!!!

Oh, me from 2010. So young, so inexperienced yet so full of optimism.

I remember three years ago I wrote a blog called “Asian guy speaks: I think Black Women have Sexy Hair!” which became an instant hit. Black women from all over the internet came flooding my way to thank me for speaking my mind and being so candid about my feelings towards their natural hair. So what do I think now, now that I actually am with a Black woman who has natural hair? Are my opinions still the same or do I have any hidden secrets woven in between?

My Natural Haired Goddess

LOOK AT HER GORGEOUS HAIR! Now look at mine! Don’t our hairstyles make a cute couple? HELLL YEAA THEY DO!

This is my extraordinarily gorgeous girlfriend, Livi.

Livi has been all natural for most of her life and as her boyfriend I couldn’t be happier. I love the way her hair catches the light in the sun, the fruity smell from the products that she uses (well, most of the products at least) and I especially adore the variety of styles that she manages to pull off. You see, some guys don’t have the patience for the whole ‘girls spending hours and hours on their hair’ kind of thing. However, I’m an Asian guy who actually cares about not looking like William Hung so I devote my sweet minutes to curing and crafting my head of hair. I blow dry it, comb it, add product, style it more, add more product then top it off with hair spray. In many ways, Livi can actually be faster at doing her hair than me — which she teases me about.

Unlike me and my sacred hairdo ritual before school, Livi spends most of her time preparing her hair the night before. Jojoba oil this, argan oil that and a host of creams and butters that would make Paula Deen salivate. Sometimes it can get a bit messy with her products all over the counter but it’s not a big deal, I’m used to it. She truly does spend a good amount of time on her hair but I get it — natural hair is far more high maintenance than Asian hair and I actually respect the fact that she knows what she’s doing. Living with a natural haired woman might seem like it would eat up the time you share together but in reality, it’s no more than an hour each day.

Touching, Feeling And Playing With Her Hair

Livi enjoying a cup of “expensively rich and decadent” hot tea from IKEA.

Prior to dating Livi I was under the impression that I would be put into a headlock had I touched or THOUGHT ABOUT TOUCHING a Black woman’s hair. Hey, that’s cool! Back when I had Asian spikes, if you so much as grazed a single spike by accident, LORD HELP YOU because I would have dragon punched your spleen out. But with Livi, she made it clear from the beginning that she didn’t mind me touching her hair. Hell, I could even play with it if I wanted.

I‘d like to think I’m not alone on this but honest to god, I LOVE playing with my girlfriend’s natural hair. I love how soft her hair feels, the way the curls slide through my fingers tugging softly at my fingertips and the sensation I get from it. When we’re watching T.V together on the couch I’ll occasionally turn her back towards me and massage her head with my fingers, making her neck tingle as her shoulders relax and drop. This, to me, is incredibly sexy and is even relaxing for myself.

“Baby, your kitchens are like a lily pad floating on an ocean of happiness on a river bank…err…something like that…”

Though, my favorite thing to do is play with her kitchens. Apparently, kitchens are the smaller hairs on the very back of a person’s natural head that tend to grow in random directions, much like a cowlick, and are often shorter or more curly than the rest. This is my playground. It’s like I’m a child again as I curl, uncurl and even smell the damn thing. Kitchens are damn cute and curse you if you ever try to make them go away! LEAVE THE KITCHENS ALONE, DAMMIT!

The Straightening Of The Hair

It’s an unfortunate reality that the American job market is biased against Black Women. Livi has been on a number of job interviews and although it isn’t scientifically tested, we’ve noticed that most of the interviews that went well were when her hair was straight while the not-so-stellar interviews happened when she wasn’t. Now, we can debate the validity of straight hair vs natural in a job interview but when you’re trying to find a new job to pay for the things you need, hell, you’ll do anything to give yourself that edge even if it means frying your hair under a flat iron (no, she doesn’t relax it — thank god.)

It makes me sad that she has to straighten those beautiful curls and when she does, I feel like a part of her physical identity is temporarily removed and a more “family friendly” and “socially accepted” version is replaced. I know it’s still my girlfriend but I just can’t help seeing it a bit differently. It saddens me even more knowing that deep down, she doesn’t want to do it either.

On her 21st Birthday we went to Bouchon, a Michelin starred restaurant just north of Napa Valley.

On the other hand, there are moments when stylistically, she wants to straighten her hair. Moments when she’s going for a certain look — maybe it’s 60’s themed or perhaps she wants to sweep it to the side — and in those cases we’re not so sad. I still prefer her natural hair but luckily, she actually styles her hair damn well so I’m always a fan.

My Love And Hate Relationship With “The Bonnet”

Shower cap or bonnet? THE WORLD WILL NEVER KNOW!…. nah, jk, that’s a bonnet.

The Bonnet. Most call it a bonnet, I call it: a chef’s hat, an ice cream cone or a Princess Leia. The first time I saw her wear one I was like, “Waddahayl? Why do you have a shower cap on?” to which she replied, “It’s a bonnet! Black girls wear it to bed to protect their hair.” And when she says she wears it to bed I’m saying she wears it to bed EVERY. SINGLE. NIGHT. Some days I think it looks like a silly little hat, other days it looks like a cute cupcake head and other nights, as in, those nights I feel a bit more strongly.

My girlfriend has gorgeous hair and seeing it tussle and move is a turn-on. So when we’re getting intimate, the last thing I want on my mind is a damn ice cream cone let alone Princess Leia with an ice cream cone on her head. It’s too damn distracting! Worse yet, bonnets seem to come in only three colors: black, hot pink and some ugly ass butterscotch color. How can I focus on you when I’m starting to think about some damn sweets?! Although, the most important reason why I dislike bonnets during these moments is that to me, bonnets signify that you’re done for the day and that you’re sleepy. So there’s competing messages between the actions being made and the bonnets being worn — catch my drift?

So yea, tip of the day: bonnets are cool except during intimate times.

But THIS is okay during intimate moments :oD

Natural Hair Is Beautiful Because?

Natural hair isn’t beautiful on Livi because of the style or the texture or the even color — even though they are. To me, natural hair is beautiful on Livi because natural hair is… (brace yourself)… NATURALLY HOW HER HAIR LOOKS! It appears exactly as it should and despite being hard to maintain and moisturize and style, she does it. She cares for her hair and it is a symbol of who she is, what she is and how she wants to be seen. And yes, her hair texture is very different from other black women but according to Livi, her hair used to be more fro-like when she was younger before it became color damaged. So her hair is part of her identity and history and if it means that much to her, if it means spending hours taking care of it and wearing bonnets and applying tons of product then HELL YES, it means that much to me too.

You see, I don’t have anything against Black women who relax their hair, straighten or dye it, wear wigs, weaves or braid it, I have no problem at all because I GET IT. I get that society has a fucked up expectation of beauty that has been developed over the years and unfortunately, natural Black hair isn’t always a part of that ‘blonde and beautiful’ story. So when I see a Black woman with relaxed hair or a Black woman with a weave on, it makes me sad. It makes me sad knowing that she has to do that to herself. She has to change part of WHO SHE IS and what is a part of her own genetics in order to feel beautiful, to feel accepted and to feel like herself. It truly does make me sad.

I see it no differently than Jewish people who try to remove the bump on their nose, Asians who pay for double eyelid surgery, pale White people that spend hours tanning or dark skinned brothers and sisters that try to bleach their skin. Sure, these are all things that can make you feel better and less insecure but the question isn’t about, “does it make them feel confident?” but rather, “why do they feel insecure to begin with?” And in my eyes, no one should have to feel like who they truly are and how they are born is anything less than perfect — especially Black women struggling with accepting their natural hair.

So to the 2010 version of myself, I congratulate you for writing that awesome blog and (hopefully) leading the way to more Asian guys falling MADLY IN LOVE with Black women and their natural hair. As for the 2013 version of myself, the one head-over-heels for a beautiful Black woman with luscious, delicious, beautiful, cute, sexy and perfect hair? What lesson should I give to myself? Well.. perhaps I’ll save my words of wisdom till Livi and I have cute little Blasian kids and I’m the one hunched over the couch combing my son or daughters hair as I cheerfully play with their kitchens.

After uploading an image of myself and Livi to this website, the site generated an approximation of what our future child “might” look like. I KINDA see it, yea?

Do Asian Guys Like Thick/Curvy/Big Girls?

Let me guess: you’re single, ready to mingle and you’re ready to say hello to the brothers in yellow. Unfortunately, despite your love for Asian guys you constantly look in the mirror and ask yourself, “will an Asian guy be able to love and handle all my love handles? Can he handle all of this meat?! WILL HE STAND TALL AND ERECT WHEN I STRIKE DOWN UPON HIS BODY WITH MY THUNDER THIGHS?!!?!” In other words…

DO ASIAN GUYS LIKE THICK/BIG GIRLS?

NEWMODELS

Generally speaking, most people tend to go after and date those who have body types similar to their own . If you take an anorexic, sucked-up guy with arms as thin as noodles, chances are, he’ll end up with a girl just as noodle-like as himself. On the opposite end, a guy with a beer baby sloshing around his gut will probably go for a girl who also has more to love. Of course, there are exceptions and unfortunately, you’re more likely to see a bigger guy with a skinnier girl as opposed to a thick girl and a skinny guy.

I know, it sucks! HOWEVER, that’s just a general way of approaching the subject. When you zoom in a bit and focus on specific cultures, you start to notice that certain ethnic groups are actually open, if not IN LOVE, with thicker, more curvacious ladies. By now most of us are aware of the countries/cultures that are more likely to breed lovers of curves: Brazil, Mexico, parts of Africa and even Hawaii.

Here’s The Bad News…

“Damn you Asian culture! Why won’t you accept my love for thick women?!”

As a whole, Asian people tend to not like bigger people. Save for the Japanese Sumo Wrestlers who are all men, most Asian cultures have a standard of beauty that says the thinner the better. While some might say this is a highly superficial and vain way of thinking (to which I do agree) you also must understand why Asian people think this way. First off, based on the fish and vegetable heavy diets that Asians have, we are simply less likely to get fat by the logic of nutrition. Combined with the reality that much of Asia is actually VERY, VERY, VERY poor, the result is a population of people who simply do not have the money nor the diets to sustain any curves.

Second, Asians are incredibly conservative when it comes to social status. Everything they do revolves around maintaining and upgrading their status in society. Part of that is to be just as skinny as everyone else. As an Asian competing against other Asians, you have to drive the same expensive car, take your kids to the same expensive University and you need to be shopping at the same expensive designer boutique while wearing the same size dresses and jeans. To an Asian, being bigger and heavier is almost an automatic deduction in one’s social status, despite how much money you make —  especially for women.

Here’s The Good News!

“Hey there lovely lady, are you new to this buffet?”

Everything I said in the previous two paragraphs mainly applies to Asian-born Asians and not Asian Americans. Also, most of the discrimination against women with junk-in-the-trunk stems from OLDER ASIANS, aka, people in their 40’s and up. Asian guys my age (I’m currently 23) honestly don’t care too much about weight so long as you’re not double our size. So if we weigh 150lbs and you weigh 240… yeaa…. you might want to reconsider. But hey! You never know! He might wanna dive right into that body of yours like a scuba diver! It all depends.

Now, this is the part where I complicate things for just a second: relative to Asians, there are a few Asians that are more likely to discriminate based on your body weight and they just so happen to be the big three: Chinese, Japanese and Koreans. “OH NO! ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT I DON’T HAVE A CHANCE TO FIND MY OPPA BECAUSE HE WON’T LOVE MY LOVE DUMPLINGS?!” Ehhh…. kinda? You see, the big three just so happen to be some of the more conservative Asians so you’re MORE LIKELY to encounter Korean, Chinese or Japanese guys that won’t date big girls. That’s simply what I’ve noticed but as always, there are exceptions. If anything, try a Filipino, Thai or Vietnamese guy! They MIGHT be less critical.

THE BOTTOM LINE

BEHOLD!!

So if you’re wondering if having a big ass or wide hips will turn-off an Asian guy, I’m pretty damn sure he’ll love it. In fact, you might blow his goddamn mind with how attractive you are. How much will he love it? It depends on how conservative he is, if he’s been with a big girl before, what kind of Asian he is MIGHT have an affect, and most importantly, how husky is he himself?

When it comes to whether or not Asian guys date big girls, the deciding factor is YOU and SOCIETY. Exactly how BIG are you and how much does the rest of society care? The reality of the situation is that your weight shouldn’t matter in a relationship. Unless your weight affects the sex, your ability to go on activities with your boyfriend or your tendency to eat a certain diet that your Asian boyfriend doesn’t like, unless your weight negatively affects your relationship, you should be just fine. But you still have to define: how BIG are YOU? And are you too big for other guys who aren’t Asian? Do you also have trouble with Latin guys or White guys or Black guys? Because if you have had problems in the past with guys accepting your weight, then I can be certain that simply switching to Asian guys won’t exactly change things.

“Where can an Asian guy get some decent THIGH ACTION around here?!”

If all else fails, hire an Asian personal trainer, tone up, get fit, take him to the locker room, compliment his biceps, pretend to drop something, bend over, show-off DAT BODY and make him LOVE THOSE CURVES!

WERK IT!

AMBW Rant: Can Black Women ONLY Date “Ghetto” Asian Men?

From time to time, I enjoy perusing through the AMBW videos on Youtube for a good hour or two. Like an alumni of AMBW University visiting his alma mater, I look upon these videos with a judgmental eye, checking to see the bullshit that ementates from people’s mouths. Recently, Asian duo extraordinaire, the Fung Brothers, posted a video called “Do Asian Men Like Black Wom[e]n?” and all I gotta say is…

DUDE… WTF?

“Brah, you just went full racist!”

You see, I agree with a lot of what they are saying and not to toot my own horn or anything, but I’ve been saying the same damn shit for YEARS. But the part that rustles the FUCK out of my jimmies starts at about 1:30 when the Fung Bros talk about the type of Asian guy that Black girls should go after. Apparently, if you are a Black woman looking for an Asian man, you need to find an Asian guy “with a shaved head, a line-up, a fitted cap, snap-back, if he knows how to rap… if him and his friends use the ‘N-word’ amongst themselves.” In other words, go find a “ghetto” Asian guy.

Now of course, I do see the point that the guys are trying to make which is to say that you need to find the Asian guy who seems most comfortable around Black people, thus he will be comfortable hitting on you and willing to pursue a relationship — theoretically. However, I simply dislike– nay, I FUCKING HATE this idea. You see, the problem with this idea isn’t about the Asian guy being ghetto and that somehow I’m trying to associate ghetto with him being BAD. No no, the biggest problem with this idea is that it assumes that all Black Women are inherently attracted to ghetto guys.

WAIT, WHAT?

“But! But! I don’t even know how to twerk! I only know the cabbage patch!”

If you make the claim that the best type of Asian guy for a Black girl happens to be into hip-hop and saying the word nigga, then what exactly does that say about your expectations and understanding of Black Women in general? What? So Black Women shouldn’t pursue the Asian guy on the football team? What about the Japanese exchange student who listens to classical music? That type of narrow thinking is not just ignorant,  it’s a bit racist. This isn’t even something that is exclusive to the Fung Bros, this is something that, unfortunately, a lot of Asian guys are guilty of.

I‘ve heard of many horror stories from Black women who feel objectified and stereotyped by MANY Asian BOYS. Boys who think that just because they are approaching a Black woman, the doors of ethical behavior rip the hell off their hinges and an everything-goes mentality is put into place. These guys might grab Black women, cat-call them and in some cases, they even try and speak differently to them, as if Black women somehow only understand ebonics. This kind of bullshit infuriates me and for the Asian guy who thinks this is okay, please, brother, kill yourself.

“Oh god! What have I done?! Why did I say ‘waddup, ma?’ to that pretty Black girl?!”

My Advice To Asian Men Interested In Black Women

When you meet that special Black Woman you want to marry and have kids with, I don’t care if she herself “talks ghetto,” if you DON’T talk like that, there is no need to start pretending like you do. Act normal. Just because you’re with a Black woman doesn’t mean you need to stop playing DOTA 2 and League of Legends in exchange for NBA2K13 and a trip to the barber shop. Be your damn self. If she’s open to the idea of dating an Asian man in the first place, then she probably expects you to sometimes do things that are a bit “Asian-y.” Don’t be ashamed, brother, treat her with the same respect you would give to a White, Asian, Latina or African girl. At the end of the day, before being a Black woman, she became a WOMAN. So make her feel like a very, very special one.

My Advice To Black Women Having Issues With Ignorant Asian Men

Don’t listen to that nonsensical bullshit about you chasing after ghetto Asian guys. Could you use that advice as a reference point? Of course. The Fung Bros did make a good point, please do take an Asian American Studies course and talk to the Asian guys there. If they are willing to become more culturally aware of their own racial identity, chances are, they might just be open about other races in general. So go for it! If you think that buff and sexy nerdy Asian guy in your Art History class has a nice jawline that you’re interested in kissing, go up to him! Talk to him!

Don’t feel restricted by your stereotypes and the pressure from society to date a “type” of guy. You are not a video hoe, you are not a welfare queen and you are certainly not a cheap girl who deserves to be grabbed and hollered at. You can run this country if you want, be a software engineer if you want and goddamnnit, you can date whoever the FUCK you want, too! If an Asian guy comes up to you in a disrespectful way, wave his sorry ass goodbye and move on. Remember, there are BILLIONS of us Asian men out there, a new one, THE RIGHT ONE, is coming soon 🙂

(VLOG) Q&A #3 – My Asian Boyfriend Won’t Introduce Me To His Parents

What happens when your Asian boyfriend continues to not introduce you to his parents and family? What does it mean and how can you better understand the situation from his perspective? In my latest VLOG Q&A I go into detail about some of the reasons for this. Enjoy!